I’m now writing for PWInsider, a wrestling news site. My first article takes a look at the sad state of tag team wrestling.

Check it out!

10. Ball boys in tennis

These little punks are undyingly annoying. They line up like they’re gearing up for the 100m sprint, then dash across the court like the Road Runner. I have to double take that it’s not a drunk, streaking fan. I can only hope that my annoyance will be exchanged with sheer delight when one of them slips and does a face plant.

9. Hockey interviews

“Uhh yeah, we played hard out there; left it all on the ice.”

“We just got to take it one shift at a time.”

“Gotta play a full 60 minutes.”

8. Football/soccer/gridiron…what do you call it?

Let’s pick a universal name for these sports and stick with it!

7. Cliché jersey numbers

Lucky #7…how original. News flash: you look like a plug. What’s worse is wearing a number like 99 and thinking its okay. Let me say, you better be a superstar if you have the nerve to carry the Great One’s tradition on your back.

6. The “Ole” song

The worst sports chant in the history of the world. Ole, Ole, Oleeee……..SHUT IT.

5. Sports networks airing non-sports

Darts, bowling, poker – these are not sports, so it confuses me why a network such as TSN would air them.

4. Bad team names/mascots

When a team takes the field/court/ice with a name like the Alberta ‘Pandas’, Ottawa ‘Fat Cats’ or my favourite – the Sacred Heart ‘Rocks’, as my elementary school was known as, it’s hard to take them seriously. Add on a dumb looking mascot, and I’m just embarrassed for them.

3. The ‘magic spray’ that heals all soccer injuries

Seriously, what is this stuff? As if soccer wasn’t bad enough, apparently this little can of aerosol spray is the heal-all for injuries in this sport. The over the top dramatizations soccer players pull are just ridiculous, and after they fall to the ground in excruciating pain – often resulting in some type of penalty for the other team,  all it takes is a little ‘magic spray’ to have them back on the field in no time.

2. Hand holding in football

I love football – one of the reasons being that it is a real ‘man’ sport. But when players walk on to the field or to the coin toss holding hands, I just can’t stand it. Not intimidating.

1. Excessive amounts of cheering in volleyball

By far the single most annoying pet peeve of any sport; I can barely make it through a full game. After every single little play players come together exchanging high fives, ass slaps, and other cheerful mementos. Why….seriously, why? Is that really necessary? The majority of the time, they’re not even celebrating anything victorious. Add in those skimpy outfits, and I’m getting a really blurred line here between volleyball players and cheerleaders.

Whether you’re a fan of basketball, hockey, football, or Ontario curling, the biggest sports news from the weekend was that I’m turning The On Deck Circle into a food blog. More specifically, the sight will now exclusively talk about Asiago Dip.

What can I say, I need to cash in on this Julie & Julia thing, similar to when I tried to cash in on Twilight by using my real name (Edward) for a while.

So…about this Asiago Dip craze…I mean, wild, right? The world is abuzz with questions about what the perfect mix of ingredients is, who the best chef is, what the best dipping tool is, etc, but we can all stop. The debate is over.

Geoff Frigault owns Asiago Dip.

Imitators shouldn’t even try. The world’s top chefs can try. The guy who invented Asiago Dip can try. Nobody will top Geoff Frigault’s Asiago Dip.

He mastered it Saturday night at a going-away party for him and Annie (Andrea…whaaaat?). It was the perfect blend of cheese, mayonnaise, artichoke, garlic, etc. True culinary fusion, and a true culinary masterpiece.

You bitches better recognize.

In addition, I stole the recipe and will be marketing the product in grocery stores shortly. Sorry Geoff, but a hustler’s gotta hustle.

In closing:

“Motherfucker, how come you didn’t tell me the cheese was so good??” – Arsenio Hall

I recently read a piece on Kyle Korver discussing his impending return from injury, and why it was delayed. The piece said:

“Although he’d hoped to return in the coming days, Korver will have to wait a little longer. He said Thursday that Cybex testing showed he still has strength to regain in his hamstring and quadriceps following surgery.

As a result, Korver will cease court work for a week and focus on rebuilding strength in his leg. Korver said he would need to test at 75 percent to be “borderline” to play; his quadriceps was 70 percent and his hamstring 56 percent.”

To this point, I wasn’t really clear on what was meant by Cybex Testing. I had only vaguely heard of it from NFL Combine chatter, but the passage intrigued me. Here, it seemed, there was a scientific method in place for measuring the recovery of injured muscles and joints. Being the Sports Maven that I am, I had to do some research to find out what exactly Cybex Testing is, and what future potential it has for the sports industry.

In a broad general sense, the Cybex Test is a fitness exam meant to test joint movement, strength and flexibility. That’s it. Nothing special there, although it becomes clear why NFL teams would want to perform the testing on prospects with injury red flags. It can also measure the balance in strength between the right and left leg, which probably has very little predictive/scouting value but could be a useful coaching tool.

That’s what I came up with from a brief Google search. Obviously, I had to dig deeper. The following are some points of interest I managed to dig up.

Cybex International
The company responsible for Cybex Testing is Cybex International (go figure), and a look around their website is recommended. They deal with a great number of sports solutions and exercise equipment, with an obvious focus on advancing fitness through technology. They have several pieces of high-end, technology-based, and ergonomically focused athletic training equipment, and seriously, a look around the website is a good time for those of us who like to drool over how much more efficiently we could train if we had professional resources at our disposal.

More importantly than their product line, I started to get a better sense of how Cybex testing works. From what I gather, Cybex equipment, by way of “technology” and equipment that conforms to natural human movements, can give a better indication of strength and cardiovascular fitness. Most importantly, I think, is the strength aspect – it appears, from what I’ve read across multiple sites, that Cybex equipment is able to measure the strength of specific muscles and joints in a more controlled manner than is the standard.

Again, I have not found this information verbatim, but it’s what I’ve been able to put together through various sources.

How It’s Assessed
I was able to find the following useful chunk of information on how Cybex Tests are analyzed:

“The purpose of this rating scale is to assist in analysis of a graded Cybex test report. This scale should be used by Athletic Trainers, Physical Therapists, Sportsmedicine Physicians and their athletes to determine strength and deficiency in involved hamstrings. This is important in rehabilitation to show regression and progression. This scale could be a major factor in determining return to play or activity. Also, this scale could be used to predict potential pathology.

The data used to rate strength and deficiency are in peak torque (FtLbs) ratio of hamstrings to quadriceps. It is to be understood that in ambulation, the hamstrings deccelerate the powerful quadriceps and in order to do this efficiently, The hamstrings must produce 50% of the torque produced by the quadriceps. If the hamstrings can not do produce this 50%, there is potential for injury or further injury to the entire lower extremity. If the hamstrings are producing >75% of the quadriceps torque, you must suspect involvement of the quadriceps.”

This confirmed my thought from my initial search that the technology, thus far, was largely geared towards lower-body analysis. What is clear is that the Cybex Testing scores the hamstrings in terms of a percentage of strength of the quadriceps, and this relationship is a fairly useful determinant in the prediction of injury and the analysis of injury recovery. Using the ratio determined by the testing, the Cybex test can determine whether the quadriceps are too strong or too weak compared to the hamstrings, identifying possible areas of weakness or injury.

The testing isn’t limited to this type (there are tests for muscle spasticity and flexibility as well, among others I’m sure).

Notes From Studies
I was able to look at a few studies as well and, while I didn’t want to shell out the money to read the entirety of the studies, I got a few nuggets from the studies that are worth noting.

*This study determined that the Cybex “pendulum test” was reliable and, “The relative angle of reversal did not differ significantly between trials… Because the test variability was not significant and because the correlation between trials was high, the test may merit broader application to patients with intracranial lesions.”

*There is some concern regarding the safety of the tests, specifically with those recovering from ACL injuries. This study determined the relative safety of Cybext testing on the knee, stating, “Repeated measures analysis of variance did not show a significant exercise effect, interaction be tween type of exercise and time interval, or change after Cybex testing for the reconstructed knee displace ment, the contralateral knee displacement, or side-to- side difference. The average difference before and after Cybex testing was 0.1 mm for the reconstructed knee. In conclusion, a single Cybex test, performed at least 6 months after surgery, did not affect anterior tibial displacement in this study sample.”

*This study was way over my head at quick glance, but it appears Cybex testing can also be useful in concert with muscle biopsy in distinguishing between muscle fibers and studying them further.

Okay, so without reading the studies in great detail, I admit we can’t gain a whole lot more than the abstract quotes above. I think the lesson from these might be that professionals still haven’t discovered the range and potential of Cybex testing….or that searching for Cybex testing is missing the forest for the trees, since there may be an entire class of testing like this under a name that is not Cybex. Shhh, let’s ignore this and focus on point number one in this section, which is what I believe the Korver article was referring to.

Obviously, methodology like this would have a great deal of potential for the sports industry. The possibilities, I believe, are at least threefold:

*Providing teams another means by which to evaluate the health of players before investing significant resources in them, e.g. times like pre-draft and free agency.

*Providing team physicians and trainers with a measurable point at which players can return from injury, while also providing a means of measuring overall physical health and an aide with which to plan and provide feedback during the course of rehabilitation.

*Identifying injuries before the point of ‘injury,’ that is, determining a player is at risk based on the same patterns that are apparent in those recovering from injury. While this may be a significant investment, a preventitive measure could be extremely useful as a guideline for team trainers trying to manage the aches and pains of an entire season while avoiding major injury time.

Cybex testing is (in my opinion, anyway) an interesting area worth watching over the next few years. It’s apparence in the NFL Draft Combine and now in the NBA is a positive sign, though admittedly someone with more knowledge and access than myself would need to delve into this topic further to make any concrete suggestions or predictions for the technology.

At the time of publishing, Cybex International had not returned an e-mail requesting more information. Not a knock on them, just trying to further clear up that this was entirely based on researching the internet, not the word of the company.

As a card-carrying member of Roc Nation and one of Lucky Lefty’s biggest fans, I felt the need to provide some clarity around the most misinterpreted lyric on The Blueprint 3. What does this have to do with sports? Well, the line in question happens to double as one of the better sports metaphors offered up in hip hop at large in the last several years, and it further cements the interconnected relationship basketball and hip hop play in one another’s culture.

(Okay, so it more of a drug reference than a pure sports one…sue me.)

The lyric in question, from BP3′s “Empire State of Mind”:

I got it made/If Jeezy’s payin’ LeBron, I’m paying Dwyane Wade

Now, even if Hov’s return since the Black Album has indeed been “Jordan wearing the 45,” that is a very clever turn of phrase indeed. But far too many people are screwing up the meaning of this basketball reference altogether. The majority of online posters and internet gangsters have completely misheard, and therefore misunderstood the line.

Most lyric sites and blogspots alike have scribed the lyrics as “If Jesus payin’ LeBron…” So far as I remember, JC was not the richest Jewish carpenter in Jerusalem, so he probably could not afford to give LeBron a max-level contract, no matter how much free fish and wine he promised. Jeezy on the other hand….

What Hova is referencing is the mixtape track by Young Jeezy called “Kobe and LeBron.” It is in said track that Mr. 17.5 drops the following line:

I used to pay Kobe, but now I pay LeBron

Just what is the Soul Survivor talking about here? Why, my young padawan, Jeezy is referencing that he gets a new discount of a kilo of China White (that Lindsay Lohan?). Jeezy claims he used to pay “24″ (Kobe) but now he pays “23″ (LeBron). Therefore, Jay is saying that if Jeezy pays 23 for a key, he only pays 3, as in D-Wade, because he has that much clout.

I got it made/If Jeezy’s payin’ LeBron, I’m paying Dwyane Wade

NBA related drug references understood…THE MORE YOU KNOW!

Team Canada Basketball is once again struggling to live up to self-imposed high expectations. For the past week and continuing through next week, Canada has been competing in the FIBA Americas tournament, a North and South American battle of 10 teams across two continents, held in Puerto Rico.

With several NBA players present and strong programs like Argentina and Puerto Rico competing, the tournament was not expected to be a cakewalk. Still, after a disappointing inaugural season under coach Leo Rautins, the program expected an impressive finish the team could build on moving forward.

So far, that has not been the case. In the Qualifying Round, Canada impressed out of the gate, smashing Mexico 95-40 and the Virgin Islands 87-67. Canada relied on balanced scoring in both affairs, lead by Carl English but buoyed in part by breakout performances from Andy Rautins (Game 1) and Jesse Young (Game 2).

Things looked promising heading into a match-up with Uruguay, a team Canada reasonably expected to beat, but some last-minute heroics stole a victory away as Canada fell 71-69. The team shot 63% from inside the arc but relied too heavily on the three point shot, firing 22 but hitting pay dirt on only five attempts (23%). Young continued his strong play with a 20-point (7/11 shooting) performance, but the team lacked a second effective contributor and the team seemed unanimously passive at crunch time.

With a spot in the Quarterfinal Round already locked up, Canada played to that affect against Puerto Rico. They fell 90-70 in a game in which they were out-rebounded (37-29) and failed to defend the three-point shot well enough (12/26) to capitalize on their own torrid long-range shooting (12/23). Andy Rautins stepped up again, hitting 6/10 from downtown, though he contributed nothing else in his 24 minutes of play. Joel Anthony also chipped in with a 13-10 double-double, the first time in the tournament he played to expectations. Anthony is also the tournament’s second leading shot blocker with 1.8 per contest.

Despite these struggles, Canada advanced to the Quarterfinal Round. However, due to the quirkiness of the tournament, Canada began the round at 1-2. To explain, the two divisions of five lose the bottom team, creating one division of eight. Additionally, your results are carried over from the Qualifying Round, except for the game against the eliminated team (in this case, Virgin Islands). Now, Canada is tasked with facing each of the competitors from the other pool, with the top four teams from this Quarterfinal division advancing to the Semi Finals.

Entering at 1-2, Canada dropped a 67-51 contest to powerhouse Argentina, lead by the strong play (12-9) of Luis Scola. Despite winning the rebounding battle (37-31), Canada turned the ball over 23 times and failed to connect on anything from outside (2/16). Carl English and Jesse Young lead the charge again, but the defense, as has been the case all tournament, couldn’t hold up well enough to deal with Tuesday’s offensive shortcomings.

Now at 1-3 and sitting in sixth in the division of eight, Canada needs to win out to have a strong chance of making the Semi Finals. Puerto Rico (4-0) , Brazil (4-0), and Argentina (3-1) now seem strong favorites to move on, while Canada also trails Dominican Republic (2-2) and Uruguay (2-2, with the tiebreaker over Canada). Luckily, after a tough match-up tonight with Brazil (lead by Leandro Barbosa’s 18.4 points per game), Canada takes on Panama (0-4) and the Dominican Republic. Brazil and the Dominican are the tournament’s highest scoring teams, while Panama and the Dominican are the tournaments worst defensive teams, so the remaining games should certainly be exciting.

The Score has coverage of the entire tournament, and you can catch a replay of Canada v. Brazil tonight at 10pm, the live action for Canada v. Panama at 1:30pm tomorrow, and a replay of Canada v. Dominican Republic Friday night at 10pm.

Check it out, and show our boys some support!

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What? Hell yeah I self promote and cyber-stalk celebrities via Twitter! I sign on like twice a week, ya! You can follow me here.

So…Usain Bolt is alright. I mean, he’s definitely not the worst.

He has me speechless, if that poor introduction didn’t tip you off. He is dominating everyone. He may actually be too good. Well, at least too good for me to effectively write about him. This is going poorly.

But what can you expect? I’m just a meager earthling, a wannabe sports writer, a mere mortal. How can I put finger to keyboard in a way that appropriately appreciates The Fastest Man on the Planet. Scratch that, The Fastest Man in the Universe. And Usain…I apologize if that statement is not profound enough to encompass your almighty dominance.

What’s G? G is very very Good. It’s appropriate that Lil’ Wayne does the voiceover for those commercials, because Usain is not the same, he is a Martian.

Yeah, if you didn’t turn on Sportscentre yesterday…uhh, Bolt broke another record. His own record, again, of course, because he is the only sprinter with records left to break. Just how good is Usain Bolt? In a word, Untouchable.

He really needs no hyping. This article is pointless. By now, you probably know what the following tables have to say – Bolt is the greatest, ever, and by far. Bret Hart, step aside, because this is truly the best there is, best there was, and best there ever will be.

Yawn. The guy is ridiculous. Oh, and they don’t let him run the 400m so he can focus on 100m and 200m. They said the same thing about 200m until he demanded to be able to run it, so it would not surprise me at all if a year or two from now I have to expand that table to include the 400m race.

He has greatly improved his out-of-the-blocks reaction time (now less than 0.15 seconds), has a school-zone speed limit fastest top speed (he was clocked at 37.5 KM/H as he slowed down at the end of his record-setting 200m run), and, perhaps most impressively, he just set two world records in the same week.

He’s not just the best; he is consistent, he has endurance, and he is very clearly dedicated to becoming better. These are all marks of a true champion.

But remarkably, he hasn’t been embraced as such. People seem taken aback by his superstar demeanor. That is, he’s flashy, he’s media savvy, he does a jig after victories, lets up in races, has a signature pose, does Gatorade commercials…he is a character in every sense of the word. Personally, I love it, and I think he can be a great ambassador for all of track and field. Some people have been slow to adopt him as a favorite, preferring their stars to be more Tiger Woods than Terrell Owens.

Regardless, there is no denying that Bolt is the best. Other sprinters wax poetic about his skills and stand in awe of him. He beat the next fastest man by more than half a second yesterday, a ridiculous victory margin of 3.2%.

There is no catching him. There is no defeating him. And as I’ve now shown, there is no describing him.

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What? Hell yeah I self promote and cyber-stalk celebrities via Twitter! You can follow me here.

I made my debut over at The Good Point! My articles for them will generally be more in-depth ‘feature’ articles rather than my usual blogs. You can check this one out here – it’s an update on Carl English’s career and path to the NBA. As a reader of The ODC, you’ll likely remember Carl from the two interviews I’ve done with him, and you’ll likely support him as a fellow fan of Canadian Basketball. Check out the article and drop a line to show Newfoundland’s Carl English your continued support.

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I’m also on Twitter. You can follow me here.

I have a few articles in the pipeline, believe it or not, and I didn’t expect my return to writing to involve wrestling…yet.

But with Monday Night Raw on in the background as I worked on a trilogy of NBA articles, it was announced that Shaquille O’Neal will host Monday Night Raw next week.

The WWE has been inviting guest hosts each week to ‘run’ Raw with ‘unlimited power.’ In recent weeks, Ted Dibiase, Seth Green, and ZZ Top have hosted. The hosts have done a pretty good job in their roles and added a few quick laughs to the broadcast, while getting their own wares co-promoted.

I’m sure the logic for Witness Protection is three-fold: promote his new show (where Shaq takes on other ahtletes at their own sports, check it), continue to market himself as a larger-than-life superstar, and have some fun. Shaq never fails to entertain, and short of actually trying to wrestle there are very few ways he could botch this gig.

For WWE, the logic is obvious – Shaq is a huge name, and this should whet the WWE’s insatiable appetite for cross-over media attention.

Tune in next Monday at 9…I mean, it’s wrestling, and I’m 90% embarrassed to even mention it on a sports site, but it’s also Shaq Diesel!

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Oh, and I’m also on Twitter, though I’m inclined to follow that sentence with ‘sadly.’ You can follow me here.

Sorry for the delay posting this Trev, I didn’t notice it until today. I know, I’m the worst HA writer and ODC editor you’ve ever known. Sorry.

To everyone else, I have three words about this article: Absolute. Must. Read.

So do it.