This is normally Pennycook v. Wilkinson, I know. You’re right. It’s strange. It’s awkward. It feels a little uncomfortable. But it’s all of those things in a ‘I’m drunk and willing to try this once’ way. It’s Wilkinson v. Murphy this time around, because Alex is busy preparing for his Podcast appearance this week (and intramural curling championships). I’d like to point out that I’m far more intelligent, knowledgeable, and good looking than Alex, so I should suffice as a one-time substitute. In the words of Barry White, let’s get it on.
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Gary Roberts Wednesdays is a feature submitted every week by Stu Wilkinson.

College basketball coaches are, for the most part, sleazy. Just a few days ago, Virginia Tech’s Seth Greenberg, while making the case for his team to get an at-large bid to the NCAA Tournament, told us that you had to be “certifiably insane” to not think his team was one of the top 65 squads in the nation. Mr. Greenberg almost certainly knows that the number of teams that get at-large invitations to participate in the Tournament is not 65. In fact, it’s about half of that, plus or minus three. This type of deliberate manipulation of the public is the norm for high-level college coaches, because, in the immortal words of HBO’s “The Wire,” they are career-minded motherfuckers. Not Mark Few.
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This article has been submitted by Stu Wilkinson, who loves cats so much it’s really starting to creep me out.

In part one of this two part series, I listed the non-BCS conference college basketball teams that I think will be impressive when the NCAA Tournament rolls around in less than two weeks . That list included Virginia Commonwealth, a team whose NCAA Tournament status is tenuous to put it lightly after a loss in the CAA Tournament. Eric Maynor and company will probably have to rely on the CAA’s reputation and a whole lot of dumb luck just to get into the show. VAC’s questionable status aside, I still think the teams I listed are solid bracket busters (Davidson, Gonzaga, Drake) or even Final Four candidates (Xavier, Memphis).

All that optimism was great, but let’s face it: I’m an incredibly negative person. I will now present to you a group of non-BCS teams that I think will crash and burn early in March Madness, if they even get there at all. College basketball fans and people who like filling out brackets every March alike will be tempted to make these teams their scrappy Sweet Sixteen sleepers, but don’t succumb to that groupthink garbage. Think of these teams as the Leroy Jenkinses of college basketball – I’m not saying they lack heart, but they do lack skill, and they will end up getting crushed in the end. If you didn’t get that reference, congratulations, another kitten just died. (Editor’s Note: I refused to place another kitten picture here.)
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Gary Roberts Wednesdays is a weekly feature submitted by Stu Wilkinson that takes a look at the unheralded, underappreciated, or blue collar legends of sport.

After last week’s discussion of the immortal Gary Roberts, this week I’m throwing a changeup and going with the not-so-immortal Greg Paulus. I feel safe saying that no NCAA basketball player has done more for the sport in the last couple of years than the Duke point guard and former high school quarterback. His tireless efforts to provide fodder for Duke haters after the departures of J.J. Redick and Shelden “The Landlord” Williams have gone mostly unnoticed and underappreciated by the general public, but I feel like this is the time and the place to give him his much-overdue respect.
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This article has been submitted by Alex Pennycook and Stu Wilkinson and is the fourth installment of their best-of-7 Point, Counter-Point series. Anyone who knows Stu or Alex or is a regular reader here knows the drill – they throw down on a few different sports questions, I arbitrarily award a split decision victory to one of them to keep the series alive (a page out of David Stern’s playbook), and they do it again a month or two later. This time, Stu has the added benefit of a victory speech, since he eclipsed Alex in The On Deck Circle’s $100 Sports Gambling Challenge by a closer-than-it-appears $459.60 to $170.37 margin. Kudos to both men for doing with hypothetical money what they’ve been unable to do with real money…make winning bets. Please note also that this is the very last time I will ever post one of Stu’s stupid cat photos, but to the victor gull the spoils, today.

Stuart Wilkinson’s Victory Speech
I’m not good at a lot of things. These include drawing, chugging beer out of bottles, and exercising self-control when I see Sebastian Telfair jerseys on eBay. But I am good at one important thing in life: Gambling on NCAA basketball games with fake money. I’m glad this talent of mine has finally been showcased through The On Deck Circle’s $100 Sports Gambling Challenge.

I have a lot of people to thank for this victory, so bear with me. First of all, the Austin Peay Governors were the horse that I rode to victory. I couldn’t have done this without them. Second, those funny pictures of cats were truly an inspiration to me during this pressure-packed week. Third, and finally (I can hear The On Deck Circle’s orchestra drowning out speech) I’d like to thank my opponent, Alex Pennycook. As a token of my appreciation I will now mock his opinions and embarrass his family in this edition of Point, Counter-Point.
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This article has been submitted by Stu Wilkinson, back-up center for the Inglewood Cobras.

This is part one of what will hopefully be a two part series from me detailing the NCAA Tournament outlooks for some of the non-BCS schools that may or may not be appearing on your Facebook brackets a couple weeks from now. Some of you might already be aware of my unparalleled forecasting abilities, probably from either the “Stu’s Novelty Sized Shoe-In of the Night” feature on your Internet Explorer homepage or the COMM350 midterm exam at the reputable Queen’s University. Well, I’m going to take some space on this fine website to put those prognosticative abilities to good use – I’m going to tell you exactly how March Madness will play out for these schools if they make it to the tournament.

Again, in order for a school to be included in this list they must not be part of the “BCS Conferences.” If you don’t know what those are, a kitten just died, and it’s your fault for not paying attention to college basketball.

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Gary Roberts Wednesdays is a weekly feature submitted by Stu Wilkinson that takes a look at the unheralded, underappreciated, or blue collar legends of sport.

Gary Roberts Wednesday is based on a simple concept – I briefly discuss someone or something that is both badass and incredibly selective about brands of bottled water. It follows that today, on this debut edition of GRW, the subject of Gary Roberts Wednesday is Penguins forward Gary “Like Chuck Norris But More Ornery” Roberts.
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If I’ve learned anything from professional wrestling, it’s that I should never admit to watching professional wrestling. If I’ve learned a second thing from professional wrestling, it’s how to plan and market a serious storyline (see: my constant threats to turn on people or deliver Sweet Chin Music to people’s families, friends, etc). But if I’ve learned a third thing from professional wrestling, it’s that friendships never last.

Shawn Michaels turned on Marty Jannetty for greater individual fame. ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage turned on Hulk Hogan over a woman. Christian turned on Edge out of professional jealousy.

And now, for a greater role at The On Deck Circle, Alex Pennycook has turned on Stu Wilkinson.
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This article has been submitted by Stu ‘Daddy’ Wilkinson.

On February 26th, the Pittsburgh Penguins sent two roster players, a high-level prospect by the awesome name of Angelo Esposito, and a first round draft pick to the Atlanta Thrashers for Marian Hossa and Pascal Dupuis. In the short term, meaning the 2007-08 NHL season, this is a good move for the Penguins. Marian Hossa adds even more firepower to the Penguins already impressive offense, and Pittsburgh only subtracts Colby Armstrong and Erik Christensen, two good but not great top nine forwards.

The loss of Colby is especially disheartening to Pens fans now – they’ll definitely miss his physical play and goofy presence off the ice – but after Hossa starts ripping pucks past opposing goalies they’ll be content again. As for Christensen, the man I call “Fake Alex Kovalev” for his sweet wrist shot, well he’ll be missed for his great potential more than his contributions on the ice this year (20 points in 49 games). Both of these guys are tough to part with, but the addition of Hossa makes the losses worthwhile, at least for this year’s playoff run. But the real question for the Pens is not how this trade affects the team this season, but rather how it affects the team in the long run.
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This article has been submitted by the man in the Marbury t-shirt, Stu Wilkinson.

If there’s one thing I like doing, it’s metaphorically raining on metaphorical parades, so let’s get right to it. Everyone loved the props involved in last Saturday’s Sprite Slam-Dunk Contest, and rightly so. Dwight Howard’s Superman outfit and Gerald Green’s cupcake excited fans worldwide, and brought the Dunk Contest “back” for the fifth time in six years – Gerald Green, Nate Robinson, Josh Smith and Jason Richardson have also done it. Howard brought the contest back in a different way than the others, though. D12 used a prop that wasn’t related to the NBA in any way to bring the fans to their feet, and that’s what has me worried.
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